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Sunday, February 6, 2011

All About Andy

Meet our son. Andrew Andualem Bishop.
*First 5 photos in this post taken by Nina & Wes Mullins*
He likes soccer.
He is a real thinker and has a very tender heart.
He loves deeply.
This is Andy's brother Esubalew. He is 23 years old. He loves Andy very much and he met with us our last day in Ethiopia to tell us all about their life and history. It was an amazing meeting.
Also our last day there, I took Andy into the bedroom and showed him a new outfit I had bought just for him. As soon as I pulled the clothes out of the bag, he immediately, without reservation or embarrassment ripped off his dirty old clothes and put on his new ones. He loved them!
Before we left that last day we also sat down with Andy and Hana and an interpreter and talked with them for a while. It was a very sweet conversation. My favorite parts of it was hearing the children tell us they loved us and were happy we were adopting them and that they would pray for us every day until we got back. We made a paper chain together. I told the children to remove one chain each day and that before all the paper was gone, we will be back for them to bring them home. Andy hung it on his bed. We should be going back in as soon as two weeks and as late as maybe 8 weeks. We made enough paper chains for 8 weeks.
Now let me tell you more in detail about the life this precious boy.
He is the youngest of 6 children. The oldest two have passed away. One was a boy who died as a baby. Esubalew did not know the cause. The other was a sister. She was 15 and walking to school one day when she was hit by a city bus and killed.
Then there is Esubalew who is 23. Esubalew lived with his Father's mother for the first 13 years of his life. She loved him and cared for him well. When she passed away, he stayed in her home. Because of living away from the family, Esubalew was not around when Andy was born and doesn't know how old he is or much about Andy as a baby. Then there is another brother who is 16 and a sister who is 14.
Their mother was a beautiful woman who was kind but very stubborn. She stayed home and cared for the children and home. Their father worked in an office that did coffee exports. He was a very kind and gentle man. He was quiet and never shouted at anyone in the family.
When Esubalew was 18 years old their mother died of AIDS. A month later their father died of AIDS as well. Esubalew gave up his Grandmother's home and went back to his parents home to be the father and caretaker of his three younger siblings. He said the strain was so terrible at first he had a total mental breakdown. He was 18 and suddenly the single father of 3. The grandparents he knew were all dead. The others he never had known of. He knows of no Aunts or Uncles. He soon had a wife and a child of his own living with them as well. He works hard each day as a day laborer. Finding a job doing parking fees and what-not each day for a typical wage; less than a dollar a day. He paid and still pays rent, purchases food, pays for the children's schooling and care. His wife recently took his 3 year old daughter and left him.
Andy is a very quiet boy. Very gentle. Just like his father. After his parent's death Andy got even more withdrawn. He missed his parents terribly. He didn't like to leave the house or play. He'd stay at home and listen to religious music and be very quiet.
The strain on Esubalew got to be too much. He decided to give his brother and sister up to the government to be put in an orphanage. He decided to keep Andy and give up the other two siblings.
But when he got to the government office to relinquish his rights to the children, he met a friend there who talked to him. This friend advised Esubalew to give up Andy instead. He suggested it would be better since he was young. I imagine he thought it would be easier to care for the older siblings and that Andy could have an easier chance for adoption than the older children. Esubalew didn't want to. He said he would go home and think about it. So he did. I believe it was a month later, he went back and agreed to relinquish Andy.
Andy was taken in. Esubalew did not tell him what he was doing. He told him he was going to the zoo. Esubalew just couldn't tell him the truth, it was just too hard for him. Andy entered the orphanage in February of 2008. The paperwork says that Andy was 5 at that time. So that makes him 8 now. Esubalew is sure he is not older than 8. Although Andy says he is 9. We feel bad we will have to burst that bubble.
When Andy arrived there, he was very sad and missed his family. But at the same time he was happy to have food to eat and to have a bed to sleep in and clothes to wear and to be able to shower. He felt sad about the horrible life he knew his family was suffering while he was no longer suffering. He didn't talk much. He didn't smile. He still doesn't smile a whole lot and he still doesn't talk much. He is so concerned about those around him, that he does not seem to worry about himself. But he has gotten much much better. He is much happier. He says he is happy. He plays and socializes more.
Esubalew went to visit Andy not too long ago. Andy told him that he understood his suffering. It makes Andy very sad to see the suffering of his family. He told Esubalew "I am being adopted by a good family. I will come back some day and make your life better." We know he will. He wants to, and we want to help him to.
We asked Esubalew what he wanted us to teach Andy. He said "To be a football (soccer in America) player." We agreed of course!
He also told us how spiritual their family was. Their parents were very religious and that was very important to them. He would like us to continue that. They are Christian. We were happy to agree to that as well.
We got a lot more information, but that is a bit of the highlights of it.
He expressed his gratitude for us adopting him.
We love Esubalew and his family. They are wonderful people.
We feel that Andy is a very special boy. His heart is so tender and giving and we feel someday he will fulfill a special mission.
You will all love him!

10 comments:

Jennifer P. said...

SO beautiful Amanda! You are my hero!

Emily said...

Thanks for the good cry this morning. I love that boy already. What a blessing to have him in your family. In OUR family. Thank you for sharing!

Stefani B. said...

It's so wonderful that you got so much information on his past! He will really need a lot of love in the coming years. You guys were truly hand-picked for Andy.

Callie said...

What a heart-wrenching story!! I cannot wait to meet him!

~Callie

Alysa . . . . and Reed said...

Thank you for sharing all of this about Andy - I feel like I know so much about him now and can't wait to meet him! He seems very mature for his age to be so accepting of the things in his life.

E said...

Thanks for sharing his story with us. What a lucky boy! He seems very sweet. I'm ready to hear all about Hana now.

Dalana and Mark said...

I have LOVED these last posts with the accompanying pictures! What touching and amazing stories! We're glad everything went so good for you guys in Ethiopia. Andy and Hana are both so very cute and you can just tell how special they are. Can't wait to meet them both! Love you guys!

Jen said...

Absolutely amazing. Let me know when your whole family is in the states, and we will do another family shoot...no charge! LOVE YOU! So proud of you!

Kelly said...

and the crying continues...I love you guys! You have so much to offer and I can't wait until these two kids get to experience all of it! XOXO!

Markie23 said...

This is all so awesome! Thanks for sharing the whole experience with us.